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[Nov. 24th, 2009|12:30 am] |
The events of the last few weeks have really left me uninterested in HP RP, to be honest. And it's not down to just one person or game, so don't anyone be getting any ideas; it's basically EVERY person in EVERY game I'm in, being dramatic and bitchy and unfair. I'm sick of the gossip, I'm sick of the backstabbing, I'm sick of OOC being more important than IC, and I'm sick of how every time I start to develop a really interesting story, something goes wrong and the game implodes or dies.
You know, whenever a game starts to get slow, people always want to justify it with "It's just that time of year." I, for one, am not buying it anymore. Barring this OOC drama, BW was ALWAYS active, and therefore the people in other games have NO excuse. It's not that time of year. It's that this fandom is full of immature, bitchy brats who let OOC politics come before playing the game, and that includes every one of us, especially myself.
There IS no such thing as a drama-free game, and there never will be, because we're all dramatic. Comes of being writers. Nothing wrong with that. What IS wrong with it is that people seem incapable nowadays of obeying the IC/OOC line, not overidentifying with their characters, and allowing IC to come first. With the number of games I've seen killed this year through miscommunication, you'd think the fandom would've learned, but no. Everyone flocks to the next best thing and does the same thing all over again, retreating further and further into their little cliques, until there's nothing left.
I've been RPing since I was twelve, but I've only been doing HP for almost three years, much less than most of the people on my flist. And in those three years, I've never seen a game die a peaceful death. I've heard about those mythical games that close when the plot runs its course, but every one I've been in has collapsed due to lack of activity, or OOC drama. You try to get people to be active (and again, not just talking about BW), and that CAUSES OOC drama, because at this point most of the fandom is bored as fuck but doesn't know how to quit.
I really wish I knew how to quit. I can count on one hand the number of people I still actively want to play with, and some of them hate each other, and of course we can't ever get past that for the sake of a game, can we? Because we are our characters, and our characters are us, and I don't mean in a Mary Sue way. We all take everything SO fucking personally. And I'm tired of it. I'm tired of the stress, and I'm tired of not being sure what people really think of me. I'm tired of always being able to find something to complain about, and rarely being able to find something to cheer. And every time I tell myself "For God's sake, just quit," I also tell myself "But you're too upset right now, you won't make a rational decision."
I don't know what to do, really. I love my characters, and there are many games I have loved, and many, many players I have loved and still do love. But here is my current conundrum, and now I really will address the BW situation directly (I'm sure you're all thrilled): I need a game with relatively high activity requirements. Not along the lines of "post every day" or anything ridiculous like that, but I always liked what we had at WR. A journal every week, a thread every two weeks. Any game I have EVER been in that required less than that was too slow, and that includes BW, where I am the activity keeper and where a shocking amount of characters had posted only one or two things in two weeks, journals and threads both. It was just easier to miss the signs, there, because so many characters were VERY active, but it's not so at most games.
I need activity, and I need requirements, and for people to be held to those requirements, and please don't bitch to me about what specifically happened at BW, which has no requirements. And I worry that, with apparently the whole fandom up in arms, suddenly people are going to go "LOL JUST POST ONCE A MONTH, YOU'LL BE FINE" everywhere. I've already seen it at at least one game, though admittedly that was a PSL.
You know what that leads to? A hint: NOT PEOPLE BEING ACTIVE.
And I can't stand that. There is nothing that drives me away from a game faster than it being slow, and characters posting next to nothing, and the mods doing NOTHING about it, and I'm not calling anyone out in particular, but I'm pretty sure that the end result of the BW clusterfuck is going to be the whole fandom turning around and acting like actually playing the game doesn't matter as much as not hurting people's feelings by telling them they're not good enough with the activity. And that is what matters to me, and I have spent the last week not feeling able to play my characters because of worrying about OOC bullshit, and I am sick to death of it. And if I'm right, and this explosion is going to turn EVERY game into the kind of lazy-ass game I loathe, maybe I am better off just finding a new hobby. |
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